well, some things happened recently. Don't ask me, because i won't disclose it. nothing personal to me. i found out how complicated this world can be. Life isn't that simple after all. Hearing both sides of the stories, i really don't know who to believe. One side was so convicing, the other side was so realistic. well, i guess i'm still a small kid, that cannot realise things around me and i cannot analyse for myself what is the truth and false. Well, i can only wish him good luck, cos i really can't do anything to help. I alrdy did whatever i can to help,i tried my best, i really did. but what i can do is limited, i hope you'll understand. Stuck, i don't know who to believe. Maybe when things happened, i'll know what actually is going on.

mum: did you wetdream?
son: errrr... (pauses for awhile) yes.
mum: aiyo, u urself know going to full alrdy cannot go release yourself meh?

ME: LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL! ! ! ! !

okay, this happened to one of my friends, but it's confidential.

AND A BIG THANKS TO TOH YEAH!! (: THANKS FOR LENDING ME UR FACILITIES. HAHAHA.

well i swear that today's POM presentation is a success! lol. Our grp is too gosu, especially when it comes to the video. OMG. LP did a great job editing the video that we filmed the day before, and yea, every1 did a great job! (:

well. my watch is broken, lost my perfume. got so many things to buy now. zz. oh my, money! saw a swatch watch not bad, 200+. waiting for pong to get me stuff discount. hehe. went swimming with pong over at toh's hse. wow, it's been ages ever since i jumped into the pool and swim. damn tired. zz. going gym and swimming tmr! (: ok tmr is my POM presentation, got to wear formal. sian sian. going thailand with yihui on oct. anyone interested in joining us?

caught the dark knight with dee, kj and yh. they are seriously a bunch of fking funny guys man. never fail to brighten the day. especially yh. lol. had a great time hanging out with them both in school and outside school. after movies went to slack with gary, baby and another guy which i forgot his name over at 201. talk abit of cock then went back hm. baby drove me home. there's a word that can describe his car. FAST. and i'm not joking. lol. screwed my BA test today. forget it. it's getting late, time to go to bed (:

well, i promised that i wld shed no tears, and yes, whatever what happens, what i came to knew that i don't know in the past, whatever shit, i am fking gna bring myself over it (:

went for movies with yk, jt, and almy over at vivocity. we caught the red cliff and it's really interesting and nice. after movies we headed over to cine and ate our supper at xing wang and i saw oj's ex. lol. such a coincidence. almy is damn funny, every food that comes she has to take pics of it before we can eat them. zz. so we chilled at xing wang for awhile and at the same time deciding where to go. In the end we joined chong and cheng over at conspiracy. so we played games and drink. almy had a little too much of alcohol, and appeared a little high. drank till around 3+ and we headed back hm, leaving cheng and chong there. lol. and yeah, i know where tanah merah crest is ok! haha. almy n jt were slping on the way back, wanted to take candid shots of their stupid faces but i failed. lol. such a waste, and that was for a friday night. working over at novena sq on sat, not a bad day. Dex,siewling and me were stoning there cos they went drinking on fri night too. so all with the fking stone face. lol. had fun working. after work i headed down to geylang and take money from gary and after that headed down to whiskey bar. people were shawn, daqi, daqi's friend, weikang, george, george's gf, boon chuan, bingnam, cheng, douglas, adrian, taiyong, rick, waichong and yewkai. had quite a great time over there, especially sabo-ing waichong to drink. but he's really a gd drinker i can say. lol. we drank ard 5 bottles and some jugs of beer. i didn't really drink alot thou. shawn, daqi, yewkai, boonchuan and me slacked over there till their closing at 6 before heading back. mr kenny came to fetch me and we went aljunied 10floor to eat kway chap. haha. headed back to slp after that. fking tired. BA test on monday. OH MY GOD.

i hope what i heard is not true, really.

I don't see i have any fucking mentality, all i know is i've been missing you. and ya, all the best. hope we'll be still friends.

yes, i need you. but how about you..? u just let go so easily. Maybe that's your way of solving problems.

sweet memories, thanks. i'll bring myself over this (:

well, kennedy's chalet was hell lots of fun especially the second night. people there were ken, leo, me, adam, yewkai, kenny, kenny's wife, kenny's daughter, alvin, salvin, wx, baobao, stella, queenie, two of their guy friends, josephine, cassandra, shihui, shuangsheng, lionel and JT. too bad andy went to msia, if not it would be even better. had some sort of a class reunion, had quite a gd time crapping around with them. really miss the sec sch days when once the lesson change, we'll get out the class and fking disturb each other at their own respective classes, and during break time we'll play around with brooms, dustpans or whatever we can use. had a great time chit chatting with lionel and JT over at a corner. it's been a long time since this has ever happened. JT is really cock, she and her theories. omg. but somehow i find it logical, somehow. LOL. ok, smoking breaks in school next time yeah! please know how to zuo ren (: and lionel, i'll hop onto your bentley in like 10 years time or something? okay next will be yewkai's chalet. hope it will be as great. ahdi came to fetch me and gary and we went to bishan to fly engine kite in the evening today, tgt with andy too. haha! fking funny. ahdi is the professional, andy is the cannot make it, gary is the beginner and i'm the barely can make it. no matter how andy tries to fly the kite, he just cant fking get the kite up. but gary is not bad, his kite can still fly for rounds before it fell. i'm not bad too, did a few attempts, at least my kite can fly abit before it drops. it's fking not easy to fly such kites. and gary is fking child-like today. throw the kite onto the sky and scared it might hit him, he actually run like a small boy. LOL. really had a great time laughing at them. andy is fking disappointed with himself, but it's alright, there's always next time. and yeah, today is the 1st day i saw ahdi's tattoos on both his legs. damn cool man. haha! orjiao came over to find me and we proceeded back to tamp to have our dinner and slack ard before i came back home.

hey i've found a way that i can really destress. it actually works for me, but there's a side effect. try putting on earpiece and turn on the music to the max on your mp3. just close your eyes and enjoy the song. preferably heavy rock (: these few days i feel that i'm able to have a better grasp of my life, and i'm gonna carry on with this. Thanks Gary, you really taught me a lot of things in life that i've never realise. You really did hit some senses into me.

gonna be busy for the next 3 weeks, and i hope things can go smoothly. life hasn't been great for me these days, but it's a part of growing up isn't it? yes, face it. i should take a good look in the mirror and ask myself whether should i deserve the things that i'm having now? or they're just bonuses for me? hah. amusing. boy called me today. he's having a good life now, with a stable job and a stable income, i'm uber happy for him. looking at him growing up from a motiveless person in life, living every day without any targets, getting into fights but now becoming a matured man with goals. happy that u can actually support a car on your own, and i hope that life will go smoothly for you! hope you'll visit pa and ma often when u got the time. and yeah, happy belated 21st birthday!! :) you're the one who watched me grow up, ever since i came out into this world, played with me during childhood days, stood out for me whenever i got into troubles. i'll never forget those days. i'll see you soon for a coffee session or something. there are more things that life can actually brings me to, i've got to realise that. never get beaten because of setbacks in life, but be motivated because you brought yourself through those setbacks. things to put down, i'll put it down.

had a bad day yesterday. drank a little too much, caused troubles for all of my friends. thanks to shawn, adrian, wai chong, charles, rick and yew kai for taking care of me. sorry to wai chong, almost started a fight with you, and adrian, sorry that i pushed u so hard, ya and a special thanks to rick, really appreciate it a lot bro. and ya, thanks to kenny for fetching me back home too. everytime when shit happens you'll definitely be there to give me a hand. i guess cheng siang did not have a great night too. lol.

once is enough, guess i've already vent everything out.

my dad is complaining about his bodyaches again. has been a few days already. it really hurts me to see his body aching all over and yet i can only help him to massage. He work so hard just for this family, or rather for me. My brother is already out into the society, earning a very decent pay. sometimes i really feel like just a fucking burden to this family of mine. Maybe 18 years ago i should not have stepped into this world. see the two folks every day worrying about money, i don't feel good inside of me also. Who in the hell can fucking understand how i feel inside? Yes, i know my job now is to study hard so next time i can provide for them, but right now the things that i see and experience at home don't really motivate me to study. I might be thinking the wrong way but yes, this is how i feel. who doesn't wish to have a good life? I don't even know whether i can get a fucking chance to repay the debt that i owed my parents. It's really far too much. I'm always being stubborn and rude. guess it's time to change. why is money always the root to problems that arises into my family? zz. i'm really mentally tired, and all i can do is only to rant here. tears dropped, no one knows. Life is unfair, absolutely true. sorry for my past stubborn-ness. from today onwards, i swear no more such rubbish.

yeah, time to blog. school so far is great. The usual classmates that always hang out with me, never fail to cheer me up whenever i was down or whatever. they really do make my life in poly good, make me feel like going to school (: life's sian recently. baby busy with her work, so seldom have time to meet up with her. but yah guess it's alright, priorities first. met up with weijie today over @ hans, talked cock and slacked with him and yk for quite a while, before gary came to find me. we headed down to geylang after that and i slacked over there for awhile before heading back home. coming sat to jia toh with gary and boat quay with cheng, rick and maybe a few others. hope i'll enjoy myself then. It's time to earn BIG bucks? YEA. lol. and Kirby, hope you won't be fooled by her again (: Brothers are always there no matter what. Don't every day wee chi mon kok. It's been a long time since i met up with Adam and gang. soon yeah. movie!